Time flies when you are having fun. Is that why some security conferences feel so long and boring?!
With 2025 seemingly the year that all the big conferences are back and fighting for bigger audiences, is this the year that we see all the Cyber BS Buzzwords back with a vengeance too?
What is Cyber Buzzword Bingo?
Think about attending a conference. Now visualise all the stands.
You have the:
- pop-up banners,
- posters on the back walls,
- covers for the booth tables,
- the autoplay slide decks,
- the brochures,
- the handouts.
Now think about the words on all of those gubbins … and look for the patterns in all the buzzwords that are there just because … well …
Turn your conference visit into a game!
You see, I got fed up with all the nonsense I saw on all the slide decks and handouts, and it seemed to be getting worse the more infosec and cyber conferences I went to.
So I came up with a plan. To highlight the problems with this nonsense and to hopefully encourage a conversation about how much TLA and BS we use in Cyber. Maybe we should speak the language of our audiences instead? Radical thought I know!!
So when you are at a conference and you see the buzzwords, tick them off your Buzzword Bingo Card !!
Let’s have fun playing Cyber Buzzword Bingo 2025 at your event!
So how does this work?
Click the link to open a randomised Bingo Card. walk around the conference you are at, and, every time you see one of the words, then tick it off your list. If you find them all then feel free to message me with the hashtag below!
#CyberBuzzwordBingo
The Cyber Buzzword Bingo 2025 Card:
Click Here …
Cyber Buzzword Bingo 2025
https://bit.ly/CyberBuzzwordBingo2025
The Disclaimer and Learning Point
This is not a direct pop at any one vendor or any one person. This list is just my personal musings (and others who helped with content for this blog). As such, no offence is meant and indeed minds can be changed from the original posting. If you do feel that there is an issue, contact me directly so we can discuss the issue you have.
Also please note, this is some fun and if you are in a marketing/comms team and you produce content – be aware of this list and think about the content you produce.
What do these words even mean?
Before we start, did you read the Disclaimer? Are you prepared for some sarcasm or snark? Then proceed!!
| Buzzword | The comments section |
|---|---|
| AI Phishing | “We use AI to stop AI phishing!” Newsflash: Most attacks still rely on bad grammar and greedy humans, not Skynet! |
| Security for AI | Can’t wait for the discussions with salespeople about this one … I wonder if any of them will have any clue what they are talking about with this one! What the salesperson should be saying is “You need security for bad implementations of AI.” |
| Post Quantum | Yes, it’s here. Quantum… the make-believe world of the algorithm that will unlock everything … but what about a Post Quantum world … wistfully stares off into the distance like Prof. Brian Cox! |
| Russia | Really – you’re going there? |
| OT Security | This one will make my blood boil … it will … I might just go full rage. Especially when you ask them what they mean by OT and they start talking about fax machines. |
| OT Pen Testing | So you mean a screwdriver don’t you… Oh wait the mod bus does what again? Grrrr |
| Automation | We have GREP installed but that’s OK because we also LOVE false positives. However, we now have AI as well so you’ll have no clue what is going on … good luck with all those tickets SOC Analysts! |
| xBOM | Where someone will try and claim they are doing another ‘Bill of Materials’ and we will be amazed at how little evidence will exist of it actually working in the real world. |
| Shift Left | We know WHAT that means, the reality is that no one is actually going to make that happen because devs don’t like security poking at their code. (courtesy of Mike Dovey) |
| Dark Web Threat Intel | Because, y’know, all criminals like to post stuff on the internet all the time without keeping any secrets at all off the internet. The Dark Web ain’t Facebook, you do realise this don’t you?! |
| AI Cloud | Yup – this piece of smoke and mirrors is out there. Go find it! |
| China | Because you have to say that at some point. |
| TLA | Three Letter Acronyms … or the absolute nonsense of words that don’t mean much. We all know it’s DNS. It’s always DNS! |
| Military Grade | Ha ha ha, have you seen military IT? Try this scale instead – LINK! |
| Zero Trust | Is this some kind of Inception, because surely it means you don’t trust yourself too?! |
| XDR/MDR/xDR | Or the “unintelligent log file scraper.” |
| Simulation | Because no one knows how the actual thing works! |
| Triangulation | You know who you are .. or as your salesperson said – it’s the magic fairy dust we sprinkle on top. |
| Nation-State | Because we don’t want to annoy China or Russia just in case. |
| -Centric | Because saying it on its own doesn’t work so you have to add Centric to make people understand that it is important. |
| Threat Intelligence | When we actually meant Threat Data and not much-added intelligence. |
| DNS | Because it is ALWAYS DNS!! So. not patching your out-of-date software or the fact the security software doesn’t work. |
| NextGen AI | We’ve barely got current AI never mind the next generation! (courtesy of Gerard Barrett) |
| Single Pane of Glass | Surely you’d want double glazing to be more efficient?! (courtesy of Matt Copperwaite) |
| Holistic | My crystals will protect you. Ohmmmm. |
| Compliance | Because one click always makes you compliant… p.s. Don’t let Lee Morton see you!! |
| COVID | We couldn’t afford to buy more marketing materials. |
| SIEM | I miss pew pew maps. |
| Data Lakehouse | It’s a data lake! No, wait, a warehouse! No, it’s… whatever Gartner says this week. |
| Blockchain Security | Because nothing says “trust” like an overhyped, energy-hungry ledger |
| Digital Sovereignty | “Keep your data within your borders!” Except when we need to move it for ‘performance reasons’ |
| AI-Driven SOC | We replaced human analysts with AI! Now it just ignores different threats, but faster. |
| Cyber Twin | Like Arnie and Danny Davito more like! |
| 6G Security | I know 5G isn’t fully deployed yet so we’ll protect the thing that isn’t out yet instead. |
| Human Firewall | Train your employees to be security experts! (Instead of, you know, just giving them better tools.) |
| Proactive Threat Hunting | We find threats before they find you!” Also known as ‘Googling the latest CVEs’. |
| AI Cyber Mesh | Because just one buzzword wasn’t enough |
#CyberBuzzwordBingo
Thoughts on
Cyber Buzzword Bingo 2025
This year it was way too easy to write. I mean – the buzzwords are already out there. Just spend 10 minutes on LinkedIn and you will see them.
Do I think it’ll improve in 2026? Probably not. We are an industry that lives off nonsense terminology and made-up context. Maybe one day … but until then, I’ll keep producing this blog I guess.
You (probably) won’t die tomorrow because your internet-enabled toaster suddenly became sentient. This is probably all the Matrix – so show me Kung Fu already!!
See you at a conference soon, come and say hi!
Thanks
Stuart
Useful Links:
Conference Survival Guide: https://www.hiddentext.co.uk/conference-survival-guide-infosec-europe-2024/
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